Remembering Johnny
as told to Dante Garza

Johnny Carson

My recollections of Johnny Carson? Let's see....well, when I was eighteen, I was dating Candy Neusberger at the time. We had started a make out session late during the news, and by the time the Tonight Show came on, we were going at it hot and heavy. Although we had never gone all the way, that night she did something she had never done before. She pulled out my noodle and started sucking on it like she was drowning and my torpedo was an oxygen supply. It was unbelievable! I held out as long as I could, but just when Ed McMahon announced, "Heeere's Johnny!" I spewed so hard I almost blew the back of her head off. That's about it.


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